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Joke of the Day

"I really want to meet this Hardon Collider. Is he a new pornstar?"

"What foreplay does the praying mantis girlfriend enjoys ? Being given head."

"Every political Facebook status should start with, ""First of all, I have no idea what I'm talking about."""

"A friend of mine died recently after drinking a gallon of varnish. It was a horrible end, but a lovely finish."

"On the news tonight they said a skull-fucker was on the loose... everyone should keep an eye out for him."

"Didja hear they're developing a new gameshow targeted specifically at an LGBT audience? Yeah - they're gonna call it ""Bruce or Dare"""

"Tower: Mission triple-three do you have problems? Pilot: I think I have lost my compass. Tower: Judging the way you are flying you lost the whole instrument panel.."

"What do Kermit The Frog'S fingers smell like? Bacon."

"What is a Detective's favourite pastry? The Tooth Hurts Donut!"

"I'm allergic to bears. One bear bite & it's straight to the ER for me."