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Joke of the Day

"If you didn't have a Lexus waiting under the tree for your lady, you're a piece of shit who doesn't know what love is."

"What is the one smell you can never get out of the house, no matter what you spray or what incense you burn? Your grandparents."

"my dream job is to be the FBI guy who nicknames criminals. someone blew up a fish market? Tunabomber. easy."

"Why does Euler's Number say it's ""going number 2"" when it pees? Because its natural log is 1. I'll show myself out now."

"What car do dogs drive? A Doge charger"

"What do you call a chicken coop with 4 doors? A chicken sedan."

"Our WIFI was down yesterday and I spent 45 minutes trying to fix it. Our dishwasher has been broken for 3 weeks and I haven't even touched it."

"Women would save a lot of money on beauty products if they ever realized they have a vagina."

"Wanna hear a girlfriend joke? Nah, you won't get it"

"A dog runs for senator... He has no previous experience in pawlitics"