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Joke of the Day

"I wonder if they have WiFi in Hell..."

"How many Android users does it take to buy an iPhone? Zero. Apple doesn't accept EBT."

"I could lose weight simply by not eating the food I drop onto my shirt."

"I was just reminiscing with my friends about our day out at the clock museum... ...good times!"

"Today's life lesson: ""I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing them off is a piece of cake."""

"US voters have definitively proven You can go black and then go back"

"ME: I want to take long walks with you. HER: Aww...are you a romantic? ME: No, I don't have a car."

"What did people say after two satellite dishes got married? The wedding was dull, but the reception was great."

"Why don't black people go on cruises? Not falling for that one again."

"What's the longest word in the world? Marriage. Because it's not just a word, it's a fuckin' sentence."