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Joke of the Day

"Why is the word ""clit"" so fun to say? It just rolls off the tongue."

"*tosses banana peel out the window during a police chase*"

"The Patriots offered the Seahawks a chance to win the super bowl They said ""no thanks, we'll pass."""

"I like my coffee like I like my wife... cold and bitter."

"If I'm a baker, you're the dough.. I knead you."

"Some random guy on the street turned me into a bottle of tequila which rather annoyed me. I hate when people Patronize me"

"How do we get rid of Ebola? Put all the infected on a Malaysian Airplane"

"""It's impossible."" said pride. ""It's risky."" said experience. ""It's pointless."" said reason. ""Ggrraadrttgrrtrr."" said Chewbacca."

"The stock market plunge of 2008 was worse than a divorce... I lost half of everything, but I still have my wife!"

"I just bought a nice 12 year old scotch His parents weren't very pleased."