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Joke of the Day

"A Frenchman comes to America and says ""Hi, I'm from France"" to an American, The American says ""European!"" to which the frenchman replies ""No, you're a peon!"""

"3-year-old: Can the baby come out to play? Pregnant wife: No, honey. She's not ready yet. 3-year-old: Wife: 3-year-old: Babies are lazy."

"Nobody gives a fcuk about how amazing your relationship is. You're on Facebook. It can't be that good."

"That's a nice ham you have there It would be a shame if someone put an 's' at the start and an 'e' at the end..."

"What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? Damn"

"What's Rick Grimes' favorite holiday? Christmas, Carl"

"What did one strand of yarn say to the other? I'm not ready to dye, I still have a few ends to tie up. ""Ball up..."""

"A sales assistant advised me on the liquor to buy for the holiday season recently She was my spirit guide."

"Nice tan, what's your race? Carrot?"

"How do you call a dog with no legs? It does not matter it will not come"