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Joke of the Day

"If Silver Surfer and Iron man... If Silver Surfer and Iron man began working together, they'd be alloys"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bing ! Bing who ? Bing down the house !"

"What's a metaphor? Winning the game tournament!"

"Today my wife was on her knees before me. ...screaming: ""Don't you hide under the bed, asshole!"""

"If these walls could talk I bet it would be gibberish cause these walls are plastered."

"What do you need to have to do the dishes when you don't want to? Dishcipline This is literally a joke I told in a dream and I remembered it when waking up."

"All squirrels fly when you own a T-shirt cannon."

"ME: my greatest strength is giving people clever nicknames. QUESTION ASKER MAN: and how is this a skill that will help you here?"

"I just couldn't stop watching the video about mechanically joining metal... It was riveting."

"OMG THIS IS SUCH A SURPRISE THE THOUGHT OF WINNING AFTER A NOMINATION IS A PHENOMENA THAT BLOWS MY MIND HOW DID IT HAPPEN - All Emmy winners"