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Joke of the Day

"Knock knock... Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (Wait for inevitable groans) Courtesy of my boss, lover of lame jokes."

"What is the worst about a being black AND Jewish? Sitting in the back of the oven. Sorry if this is considered extremely racist mods, please remove if you consider it to be!"

"Did you hear the founders of New York City were Jewish..... Who else can buy the most valuable land in the world for 26 seashells."

"Annoying guy trying to hit on me: This is like a scene from a romantic movie. Me: Yeah, I'm the iceberg and you're the Titanic. #Queen"

"Scientists have revealed today that they have found a new drug for depressed lesbians.. .. It's called Trydixagain."

"How many feminist does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. 1 to screw it in, and one to suck my cock."

"Don't sweat the petty stuff Always take time to pet the sweaty stuff"

"YOU'LL GO BLIND When we were young teens, we were told not to masturbate or you'll go blind. I always thought that was a joke until I heard about what happened to Bill Cosby"

"Adele called her first albums 19 & 21 because they are numbers that have special importance to her life Her follow up 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510 is due out next month."

"*Lying in hospital Doctor)Your back is broken in 6 places. You may never walk again Me)At least I got all the groceries in one trip"