226550

Joke of the Day

"Remember duck tape turns no no no... In to mmm mmm mmm"

"You can't trust atoms.. ..They make up everything."

"""Cool hand, Luke."" - Darth Vader, enviously"

"What did the other vegetables in the garden say when a rumor was going around that two vegetables might start dating? ""I heard it through the grapevine."""

"I always carry a picture of my wife and children in my wallet. It reminds me why there's no fucking money in there."

"Ive decided to run a marathon for charity I didn't want to do it at first, but apparently it's for blind and disabled kids so I think I've got a good chance of winning."

"What did the skeptical turd say to the conspiracy theorist asshole? You're shitting me, right?"

"Farmer Jones bought a herd of pigs from a Roman farmer who moved into the next valley and boy is he sorry. The hogs won't come to the feed trough unless he calls them in Pig Latin."

"I bet the first mohawk was created by a guy trying to even out his sideburns."

"I wouldn't say Christmas gnomes are ugly But if beauty's skin deep then they were was born inside out!"