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Joke of the Day

"What did the duck say after it split the atom ? Quark ! Quark !"

"the only dates i get Are the system software updates to my xbox. Play station. PC. Phone..."

"Sometimes I like to freak my husband out by asking where this relationship is going."

"My wedding vows said ""till death do us part."" My wife died, so I was a free man. Then she came back and bit me."

"""I'm so lucky to have you.""--- Me to my hand. No, it's not what you think. I just watched Hook."

"What do all 'Tickle Me Elmo' toys receive before leaving the factory? Two test tickles."

"Niantic's customer support minor text fixes Edit: The title **is** the joke."

"What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed? Oh sheet."

"Q: What do you call 55 men watching the superbowl? A: Pittsburg Steelers"

"Why are there so many piggy banks? Pigs don't like to hide their money in the mattress."