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Joke of the Day

"Make sure you get your ham early for Christmas... Because thanks to Putin there will be no Turkey left."

"Why couldn't the bike stand up? It was too tired."

"Why did the man with one butt cheek get fired? He did everything half-assed."

"What's the object of Jewish football? Get the quarter back."

"Apparently someone in London gets stabbed every 90 seconds. Poor guy."

"My pedophile support group kicked me out last week I was getting a little behind"

"Teacher : What's happens to gold when it is exposed to the air ? Pupil : It's stolen !"

"I had to stop eating clocks, it was too time consuming."

"QA Engineer Goes To A Bar He orders 1 beer. He orders -1 beer. He orders 644644678 beer. He orders a goat. He orders asdfg."

"I am Bill Gates and today, I will be teaching you how to count to ten: 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10."