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Joke of the Day
"What is a neckbeard's favorite language? M'lay."
Next Joke
"Lobster Tail & Beer. My three favourite things."
"I don't want to live forever... But I do want to see the end of the DFS* sale. *Insert regional sofa store"
"Searching for stuff on the internet when you're drunk is called Beer Googles."
"""Actually, I'll have you know I have a degree in liberal arts"" ""That's great ma'am, but I ordered fries with my meal"""
"My deaf girlfriend was talking in her sleep last night. She nearly took my fucking eye out."
"If you see me running down the road crying, it's because I hate running."
"How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a really obscure number, you've probably never heard of it."
"Why can't your penis be 12 inches? Because then it'd be a foot"
"Jewish football What's the worst part about having an all Jewish football team? You have to replace the whole team every time they take a shower"