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Joke of the Day

"Woman in bed: Aaagh! Aaagh! A ghost just floated into my room! Ghost: Don't worry ma'am I'm just passing through."

"Why wouldn't they let Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman"

"Me: *enters exam room Doctor: Please take off your... M: *unbuttons pants D: ?? M: *pauses* D: GLASSES! D: I'M AN EYE DR DAMNIT!"

"I believe Donald Trump can make this country what it once was- -an arctic region with zero population"

"That moment when you mom says she was a virgin, but then 3 random dudes show up on your birthday with gifts."

"Thank you for calling. To speak with a human being, please hang up and travel back to the early 1990's."

"How do you get a homosexual man to have sex with a heterosexual woman? Shit in her cunt. (its just a joke people)"

"What do homosexuals and appliances have in common? They both turn on when plugged. And a difference? An appliance doesn't work when the plug is wet."

"Dear Kelloggs, Cereal that makes them go back to sleep. Sincerely, Tired parents"

"Donald Trump has announced that he plans to extend his wall across the oceans... This news came after he discovered that a man named Jesus managed to walk on water."