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Joke of the Day

"There is only one true way to make your pancakes more metal Start referring to maple syrup as tree blood."

"Why don't you ever see elephants hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it"

"I only learned Roman numerals so I can be damn sure which Rocky I'm about to watch."

"What did the judge say when the defendant cause a ruckus in vegetable court? Bay leaf get him out if here!"

"What's the number one cause of dry skin? Towels."

"Why doesn't Nickelback play football? Because even if they had 4 players they still couldn't throw a ball."

"What do you call a cheap circumcision? A rip-off. Well, you can't blame them. They don't make much money, they just keep the tips."

"So a coworker of mine made a joke about midgets going extinct. And I was offended! Because there is nothing funny about a midget shortage."

"How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? It depends on how thinly you slice them."

"Lizzie Borden had a couple of really good lifehacks."