220616
Joke of the Day
"How do you spell a hated opponent with three letters? NME (enemy)."
Next Joke
"A termite walks into a bar... And he says, ""where is the bartender?"""
"poetic injustice ITS ALWAYS BEEN A LIFELONG WISH TO MAKE LOVE TO A CONTORTIONIST AFTER YEARS OF PLAYING ALL THE ANGLES IT LOOKS LIKE I'LL NEVER BE ENTANGLED"
"Stephen Hawking walks into a bar haha just kidding"
"There's a butterfly in my office and a nerf gun in my purse. Susan, clear my schedule."
"Him: 'Sorry Mr Hill, no last minute call from the Governor. Any last words?' Me: -whimpering 'She squeezed the toothpaste from the middle'"
"I'm 30 and my knees won't even let me leap down steps to catch a subway. So yes, I think the Die Hard franchise is unrealistic."
"Did you hear about Princess Diana on the radio? and the windshield.. and the dashboard...."
"What do straight guys and lesbians have in common? They both like girls"
"The only laid I'm getting... is laid off."