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Joke of the Day

"What does Reddit and Dating have in common? It wastes your time and you walk away with either tears or a slight chuckle."

"Life is going pretty good for me lately I guess. I just got a booty call last night. It was from life. Apparently it still wants to fuck me."

"Do you ever get a shooting pain through your body like someone has a voodoo doll of you and they are stabbing it? No? How about now? Now?"

"Bono from U2 is the voice of my car's GPS It sucks. The streets have no names and I still haven't found what I'm looking for."

"Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because D shells are too big."

"Did you hear about the Mexican hit-man who was a chronic masturbator? He got excited when he was ordered to rub Juan out."

"My wife asked me 'What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? And if you haven't figured it out by now you'll never figure it out will you.'"

"I have a bad feeling we're going to pay for Taylor Swift not having a boyfriend on Valentines Day."

"What do you call an African man with alot of problems? A Zulu Worry-er > I actually made this up just now while chilling with some of my black friends. They loved it."

"Why couldn't Hitler fly a plane? Because he could Nazi very well."