21973

Joke of the Day

"I'm probably not the person to ask to talk to kids about the dangers of drugs seeing as my year on ecstasy was the BEST YEAR EVER."

"How do you make holy water? You just take normal water and boil the hell out of it."

"They say you can't skip leg day Ironically it is because of leg day that you can't skip."

"What is a psychic medium? ...smaller than a psychic large."

"Dating is a lot like parking All the good ones are taken. The rest take a bunch of effort or are handicapped."

"What do you call an online relationship? E-bae... I'll see myself out"

"What do you call two Mormons caught in the rain? Washing your whites on a rinsed cycle."

"Got so wasted last night, had to take a train home. And now I can't figure out how to return it."

"Old mathematicians never die, They just lose some of their functions."

"Did you hear about that guy who was crushed by his Honda? Police say he died of his own Accord."