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Joke of the Day

"How does a woman know she's sleeping with a forklift driver? He beeps twice before coming through the flaps."

"Are you waiting for my comeback? You can scrape it off your mom's teeth"

"soda commercials take place in a parallel universe where everyone on earth is straight edge"

"Why do female skydivers wear jock straps? So they don't whistle on the way down."

"How do you blow up a Muslim's iPhone? Put it into airplane mode."

"Why is there such a shortage of teachers in Africa? Teacher's aides"

"[During surgery] DR DOG: Suction please. NURSE: But there's no bleeding. DR DOG: I know *drooling* but just look at that liver!"

"The average Canadian couple says ""sorry"" 112 times in their wedding vows"

"My ""Pi"" tattoo is taking longer than I thought"

"Forgive me, for I have sinned. Same time tomorrow?"