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Joke of the Day
"James Franco is making a movie about lesbian vampires. I'm betting it'll be a period piece."
Next Joke
"The person who took my sneakers while I was on the jumpy castle at McDonald's Please grow up."
"DATE: Ooh, such long fingers ME: Yeah, know what other long body part I have? D: I have an idea *sexy wink* M: My intestines are about 30ft"
"Haven't listened to Staind since middle school... ...it's been awhile"
"Why does Santa always have a big sack? He only comes once a year."
"LPT: Name Your Hands, Instant 3some"
"[job interview] Interviewer: It says here that you are a blowfish. Would you care to expand?"
"What do you call a gay cowboy? A jolly rancher."
"Why did Anakin kill all the younglings? To get to the other side."
"My dog gave birth recently. My dog gave birth to a litter of 8 puppies. We named one puppy johnny, he is a real son of a bitch"