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Joke of the Day

"whenever i get frustrated with the world i remember that some birds can talk and then i get so amped"

"I'm not saying she's a sl*t but whenever she eats a banana in public, she puts one hand behind her head."

"Did you hear about the terrorists who hijacked a plane of lawyers? They threatened to release one every hour til their demands were met."

"I once sat down with Oprah to discuss my drug use but I was high & that might not have been Oprah because why did she need to borrow money?"

"2050's kids won't get this... Snow"

"What is the difference between a banana and a bell? You can only peel (peal) the banana once."

"Heard The Wall Street Journal just dropped Facebook stock results to the Comics Section"

"What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? ""Hold onto your nuts, this isn't going to be an ordinary blowjob!"""

"What computer monitor sings the best? A Dell."

"Why couldn't the Dali Lama go out and play with his friends? Because he was grounded."