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Joke of the Day

"Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long."

"Why are there no Walmarts in Syria? Because there is a target on every corner. Guys, this syriaous."

"I am afraid of heights That's why I never get high!"

"Every snack you make, every meal you bake, every bite you take, I'll be watching you. Dog"

"Two tangents meet at a bar After a long evening the one tangent says: ""That was fun, we should meet again!"" The other: ""You know that isn't going to happen!"""

"What does the rest of the colony call an old ant? An antique."

"So Aaron Hernandez is going to prison... He's going in a tight end, and coming out a wide receiver."

"6yo: I can't wait to be an adult! Me: Adults don't get snow days. 6yo *faints*"

"IDEA FOR COURTROOM SKETCH ARTISTS: a camera"

"Jew problems An old jew comes to a rabbi and says: ""Please help me, my son became a christian!"" The rabbi replies: ""i can't help you, god has the same problem."""