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Joke of the Day
"What did the midget say in the crowded elevator? You guys are a bunch of assholes."
Next Joke
"Nice empty fish tank It'd be a shame if someone were to FILL IT WITH SNAKES! *the terrarium is invented*"
"Some people feel the rain, others just get wet... ... and others wet themselves thinking no one would notice."
"Young guy goes in for his annual physical Doctor says: You have to stop masturbating Young man: What?! Why?? Doctor: Because I'm trying to examine you!"
"""I can't wait until this one orange erases years of poor eating choices."" -me, dieting"
"What do you call Jewish folk from New Jersey? Orange juice."
"The bartender poured me a scotch and asked me what I thought of it. I told her it was neat."
"Favorite tank of ISIS is IS-2"
"Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He wanted to get a long little doggy"
"Just flipped my son off behind his back because I'm an adult and don't get into arguments with 4 year olds."