216758

Joke of the Day

"If sex is the food of life, then masturbation is a snack in between meals."

Next Joke
 
"What's Red and smells like Blue paint? Red paint."
"If I eat healthy today then I can have one piece of candy as a reward. If I eat unhealthy, then I can have the whole bag."
"What is a short punchy statement? Boxing Midgets."
"Why shouldn't you buy Ukrainian underpants? Cos Chernobyl fall out"
"What does a Bactrian camel have in common with a very lazy prostitue? Humps on the back."
"BOSS: you're an hour late GUY WHO'S ABOUT TO INVENT DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME: oh you haven't heard?"
"Love is like a fart... If you have to force it, it's probably shit."
"Inventor of raisins: ""What do you like about grapes"" me: the juice part, the freshness Inventor: right but what if they had neither"
"Ellen Pao's front teeth"