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Joke of the Day
"Will I have an open casket at my funeral? Remains to be seen."
Next Joke
"Tell me, ""everything happens for a reason"" so I know you're an idiot."
"How I feel when watching youtube... I dont mind the buffer ... I dont mind the adds... But when the ads buffer... I suffer"
"So much has been going wrong in the USA You would think it had been built on thousands of ancient Indian burial grounds."
"Are kids that are born in a whorehouse called Brothel Sprouts?"
"How many gays does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just you"
"Last night I went out drinking with some high school friends. About 2 hours into it they were like... ""Dude, shouldn't you be hanging out with people your own age?"""
"Making plans with a stoner is like having sex with a prostitute... ...They tell you they're coming, but you know it's a lie."
"I was sitting in traffic the other day... and I got run over."
"[sees a kid at the park doing the pee pee dance] ""NO KID, WAIT- [it starts raining buckets of pee]"