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Joke of the Day

"Piss me off in the grocery store and I'll get in front of you in the checkout line and pay for a single tomato with a personal check."

"What do people from Cape Cod say to their butts? Hyannis"

"My all time favorite lawyer joke. Q: What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW full of lawyers? A: The porcupine has the pricks on the outside."

"I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went.L Then it dawned on me."

"The President of Nintendo Died... The ambulance went WII U, WII U, WII U"

"Staring at large boobs makes you better at multi-tasking. It demonstrates you can concentrate on two things at once."

"What do you call a bartender giving two dolphins a drink? Serving dual porpoises!"

"What would you call two banana skins ? A pair of slippers."

"What's the difference between a jew and a Canoe? Canoes tip"

"What do you call Central Florida? The DMZ. Disney Militarized Zone."