214771

Joke of the Day

"Oh, topical reference. You sure are about something."

"Sex is a lot like pizza... Even when it's bad, you still have to pay for it."

"Where do galaxies go to college? University! Happy 1st day back to school to many of you :)"

"If a man tells you he'll fix it, he will fix it. There is no need to incessantly remind him about it every 5 to 6 months."

"The NSA Agent Why couldn't the NSA agent leave the Russian airport? Because he got Snowden!"

"It's become so annoying at weddings, when elderly relatives start playing the game of ""I wonder who'll be next""... ...so I've started doing the same to them at funerals."

"You shouldn't call short people ""midgets"". It isn't the right gnomenclature."

"Potato chips bragging about having less fat - I don't think you understand people who eat you."

"Having a mustache is a great way to stop people from drawing a mustache on you in permanent marker while you sleep."

"Why are there so many Chinese people? Because as soon as you fuck a Chinese girl, you're horny again half an hour later."