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Joke of the Day

"Anyone who says the bee movie is racist is wrong... I think they mention black and yellow about a trillion fucking times."

"What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money."

"Remember alcohol is NEVER the answer. ""Why can't I get it up?"" Okay, sometimes alcohol is the answer."

"My medication says to store it in a cool, dark place. So I keep it in a jazz club in Harlem."

"What do you call a man with no arms and no legs inside a volcano? Anakin Skywalker. (Happy Geek Pride Day!)"

"TIP OF THE DAY: If you can't afford porn, just turn on tennis and shut your eyes."

"Haegel, Nietzsche and Aristotle walk into a bar... Why?"

"ME: There's no i in team but there is one in pizza WIFE: so you're not going to share ME: I am not going to share"

"What did the Mexican say when a gust of wind blew his homework out the window? Come back essay!"

"My grandma once told me... that she is a virgin"