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Joke of the Day

"Most offensive joke I've ever heard So I was going down on this old lady when I tasted horse semen. So I stopped and said ""Oh grandma, that's how you died"""

"Its been so long since I've had sex, my next time can't possibly be bad. For my partner, however, its guaranteed."

"What did the anti-vaccer say to her son? I miss you."

"*eats everything*"

"Sing to the tune of ""Yankee Doodle""... Helen Keller went to town, A-ridin' on a pony, Stuck a feather in her hat and called it ""Hunngunnggunufffungg"""

"Knock, knock... Who's there? Daisy Daisy who? Daisy me rollin', they hatin'!"

"Never underestimate the power of the web. -Charlotte"

"You wanna mess with me, pal? You wanna mess with the saddest man in town? I've got a whole crew of sad boys just waiting to burst into tears"

"I got a boner at a funeral today.... Mourning wood."

"Childhood is like being drunk, everyone remembers what you did, except you."