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Joke of the Day

"I'm ""needs to go to bed early because I'm going to a concert two days from now"" years old."

"With the election coming close, I trust Bill Clinton the most... He always picked someone other than Hillary, so I will too."

"I like my women like I like the sun... Not exploding."

"I looked down on the earth from an airplane yesterday and there are PLENTY of trees left, don't worry!"

"On my birthday, my wife asked me to take her some where she never visited... On my birthday, my wife asked me to take her some where she never visited. So I took her to the kitchen :P"

"I got up early to watch the sunrise And then it dawned on me."

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? It may take me a while to get hard, I got laid last night."

"We all know Elton John is amazing on the paino.. But did you know that he sucks on the organ?"

"What signal tells you that a politician is lying? The lips are moving"

"You don't fully know your own strength until someone tries to pull you onto a dancefloor against your will."