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Joke of the Day

"""How the fuck should I know if it's still good? Eat it. You get sick, it wasn't good. You people, you think I got microscopic fucking eyes."""

"A Japanese man meets a midwestern man The Japanese man says, ""Good morning! Where are you from?"" The midwestern man replies, ""Ohio, Ohio"""

"I once had a friend addicted to drinking breaker fluid. He said, ""I can stop whenever I want."""

"Nothing like a left handshake to make me wonder why you're weird."

"What do fish in Jamaica smoke ? Sea-Weed. I'll show myself the door."

"Whats the worst part about a black out in Detroit? All the pairs of floating eyes"

"Why should you not trust atoms? They make up everything."

"*Pays $450 for ticket to hockey game. *spends the whole game on iPhone."

"A joke from my grandfather who is a Indian man in the United States. Him: ""Muslims are going to vote for trump"" Me: ""Really?"" Him: ""Yeah. They want him to stop their parents from visiting constantly"""

"I'd completely forgotten I had a boomerang It just came back to me."