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Joke of the Day

"Girl, you can call me the Pillsbury Doughboy because I got whatchu knead.."

"I used to suffer from delusions that I was a bland, flavourless cut of meat... but now I'm cured."

"What only lasts 40 seconds for men and leaves them hot and sweaty? A bowl of Ramen Noodles"

"Golf is a lot like taxes - you drive hard to get to the green and end up in the hole."

"Customer: You said these pants were pure wool but the label says ""all cotton."" Salesman: Oh that's just to keep the moths away."

"Did you hear about the guy who burnt down the Chinese restaurant? He was charged with won ton destruction ^^*cue* ^^*groan*"

"I was at a restaurant and my waitress had a black eye So I ordered really slow, because she obviously doesn't listen"

"The craziest shit happened today. Then I just wiped it away and got on with my day."

"I was gonna make a gay joke. Butt fuck it."

"A wise Chinese man once said, ""If a dog barks it's undercooked"""