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Joke of the Day

"Why was he woman arrested on a cattle ranch for wearing a silk dress? She was charged with rustling!"

"So carrying a ""wet floor"" sign and putting it down immediately after using your best pickup line on a woman is frowned upon Dating is hard."

"Teacher: You aren't paying attention to me. Are you having trouble hearing? Pupil: No teacher I'm having trouble listening!"

"California is getting so much rain right now... ...that even Caitlyn Jenner is getting wet."

"Sorry, I'm holding out for the Zune Mini."

"What do you get when you cross a dog and a frog? A dog who can lick himself from across the room"

"Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley? A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own."

"When is a body builder's shortest workout? During the winter Swole-stace"

"I've been fired from work for putting in too many hours Clock manufacturing isn't as easy as you think ^(yes I thought of this after reading the shifts-keyboard joke)"

"I hate when I'm trying to sleep at night But my ADHD's all like: One Sheep... Two Sheep... Cow... Chicken... Turtle... Ol' McDonald had a farm... Hey Macarena!!!"