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Joke of the Day

"We see you, people with transitions glasses that haven't fully adjusted to the correct lighting. We see you."

"""Hello, Police? I'd like to report an anonymous tip."" Me: Hello, Police? I'd like to report an anonymous tip. Dispatcher: Go ahead. Me: Flossing daily reduces your risk of tooth decay."

"How do punctuation marks get freaky? The comma sutra"

"What's a spiders favorite way to learn? A webinar."

"After moving to a boring part of the West, what did Sauron say when he spotted gaps around the threshold to his home? I need more door."

"I artificially inseminated a cow this morning! It's true! No bull!"

"The most important thing about telling a joke is timing"

"*Gets divorced* *Deletes 'actress' from LinkedIn profile*"

"What type of drugs do ducks use? What type of drugs to ducks use? Quack cocaine."

"Why was the mathematician stressed out? He was in a dilemma."