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Joke of the Day

"""do you answer the phone while having sex"" a woman asks her friend. The friend says ""only if its my husband calling me..he's my husband after all""."

"I'll never forget what my grandfather told me before he kicked the bucket. He said, ""Son ... How far do you think I can kick this bucket?"""

"Q: How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb? A: Five. One to handle the bulb and 4 to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it."

"News says there were a ""record number of marijuana seizures"" in 2015. Weird ... after all these decades I've never had a single seizure."

"What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back."

"There's no time capsule quite like the pocket of a coat that's been in the closet for a year."

"Why is the lineup at the electronic store never straight? BenQ"

"Made a pizza today with Indian bread It was like Naan other"

"It will be light. It will be dark. It will be light. It will be dark. It will be light. Then I'm back. Me, explaining a vacation to my cat."

"What Kind of Motorcycles do Lesbians ride? Chowasaki. - Pat H."