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Joke of the Day

"An Irishman is driving to the airport While driving, he sees a sign that says ""Airport left"". So he turns around and goes home"

"""Tony, why do you always go around spelling your name backwards?"" Tony: ""Why not?"""

"How do the Chinese name their children They drop silverware in the sink and listen to the sound it makes"

"Two rednecks are sitting on a porch... ...watching a dog licking itself. One redneck says to the other, ""Boy, don't you wish you could do that?"" The other replies, ""That dog'd bite yooouuu!"""

"DATE: This place is so fancy ME: Ever have a guy splurge on you before? DATE: Well, only when we didn't have a condom"

"whats the difference betweens a violin and a fiddle? A violin has strings and a fiddle has strangs."

"Why did the punk cross the road? He was safety-pinned to the chicken."

"What did the cannibal butcher say to his uneasy customer? Don't worry, it's all ethically sourced! All my produce commited suicide!"

"Whenever I see WHOA spelled as WOAH, I assume it's referring to Noah's evil twin whose Ark housed all the insect and arachnid life."

"People always ask me, where do I come up with my status', do I make them up, or do I get them from the internet.. Truth is people. I use Status Enhancing Drugs."