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Joke of the Day
"*pulls knife out of back* *selfies with it*"
Next Joke
"I've got a joke about Jonesville but the punchline is too long."
"[caught hiding something in the garbage] gf: are you eating hot wings again? me: no gf: oh really, then touch your eyes me: god damnit"
"What has 75 balls and screws old ladies? Bingo!"
"Do you know that awesome feeling after understating math? Me neither"
"Trump worked his way up from nothing. He's going to give every American the same 1 million dollars he started with. That's all you need."
"What did Dave Grohl say when he accidentally dropped his sandwich? ""There goes my hero"""
"What's the hardest part about rollerblading? Telling your parents that you're gay"
"Isn't America great! People shouting USA! At sporting events or after a disaster and we bond together. Or at home depot where its like I'll take you essay and you essay and you essay over there."
"What happened when the slave put his head into a lions mouth to count how many teeth he had ? The lion closed its mouth to see how many heads the slave had !"