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Joke of the Day

"I've had sex with over 80 women... I've also had sex with a few under 80 but they just didn't have the experience."

"The shittiest joke I know. A: My book is coming out soon! B: Really?Cool, congratulations. A: Thanks. I probably shouldn't have eaten it in the first place, though."

"A monster goes to a petrol station and says: Fill me up The man at the petrol station replies: You have to have a car for me to do that!. The monster replies: But I had a car for lunch!"

"Why did the orange move to veggieland? So he could live in peas and hominy."

"Why couldn't Bing start a fire? No matches founds"

"The chicken crossed the road. Him: Why did the chicken cross the road ? Her: Because she had heard that the mayor was going to lay a cornerstone and she wanted to see if he could really do it."

"What do you call an old person trying to fit in with today's kids? A dislocated hipster."

"I would like to tell you guys a joke... ...but I'd rather keep it about the film."

"How do you call a dog with no legs? It does not matter it will not come"

"Research shows that the number one cause of divorce in America is Marriage"