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Joke of the Day

"Phone just autocorrected ""your"" to ""yore"" in case thou wouldst think I'm smarter than thee."

"There are only 10 types of people in this world Those who understand binary, and those who don't."

"Please stop praying for my grandpa u are making him too strong. He broke out of the hospital & cops say their tasers don't work on him :("

"Why don't Jedi mathematicians use the absolute value function? Because only a Sith deals in absolutes. ^and ^it's ^non-differentiable ^at ^0"

"Why was the desperate teen spinning in circles around the hot chick? Because he really wanted that beyblade."

"Wife to husband: ""Our son called me a whore!"" Husband answers: ""Where is that son of a bitch?"""

"Your girlfriend isn't hallucinating man, she's actually seeing other people."

"Inside jokes are bitterly resented by the homeless."

"Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar n."

"Dad called me a cunt I always buy him socks for Xmas. I said, ""you bastard, it's the thought that counts."" I could tell by the look in his eyes he would have kicked my head in if he had legs"