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Joke of the Day
"Why is divorce so expensive? ... because it's worth it."
Next Joke
"Damn you Jehovah's, suckered me in to opening my door. Sure,I'll read your literature, while you read my twitter. We'll see who converts who"
"Because I'm such a Portal 2 fan, I created my own levels. Sadly, none of the ""volunteers"" have made it out alive and their families are starting to ask questions."
"What's the most sensitive part of a man's body when masturbating? His ears."
"DATING TIP: add Free Wi-Fi' to your dating profile"
"A percussionist tells his fellow percussionists some puns His group laughs at every pun he makes. He asks a friend: Hey, are my puns a tenor what?"
"imagine explaining a magazine to a teen today ""yeah it's four bucks, there's like 900 words on 32 pages, and you'll get another next month"""
"Only a few of you have figured out that in every tweet I've ever written I've been subtweeting Pitbull."
"Bono is gonna be really pissed off when he finds out he's not Jesus."
"Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because your face is UUUUUUGLY!"