20524

Joke of the Day

"Rednecks What do you call a redneck virgin? A 10 year old girl who can run faster than her brother and father"

"Beyonce didn't almost fall everyone else just messed up"

"Did you hear about the 100lb midget with the 50lb balls? He was half nuts."

"How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up."

"friend: here he comes. dont set him off again. me: ok me&friend: hey JADEN SMITH: What If We Are the Hay, And The World Is Harvesting Us?"

"When a cop asks if you know why you were pulled over, respond, ""I'm actually not allowed to discuss the details of the case"""

"David Bowie died at 69, Alan Rickman died at 69... ... Donald Trump is 69. We are all crossing our fingers."

"I accidentally just sent a kissy face emoji to my female boss... and now we wait for the call from HR on Monday."

"""Went to watch a movie, I was wearing shorts and he swiped his finger on my leg. Later found out he wiped his booger on me"""

"Rick Astley will let you borrow all the movies in his Pixar collection except one, He is never gonna give you Up."