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Joke of the Day

"Me: What's one thing you don't like about your girlfriend? Him: She doesn't swallow. Me: What? How does she eat?"

"Fireworks? Yes it does."

"You guys hear about the antique shop owner who liked to have anonymous sex with menstruating women? Nobody could tell which period his dick was from."

"How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Look for the fresh prints"

"What color are Margaery's eyes ? Blue. One blew this way, the other one blew that way!"

"Why is the ocean salty? Because the land never waves back."

"What happens if an Asian gets stung by a bee? Their GPA drops"

"I heard my idiot friend talk about inequality the other day and I couldn't help but draw some parallels. :)"

"What do you call a man in the ocean with no arms or legs? Bob."

"I just watched two mice screwing in a lightbulb But for the life of me, I can't figure out how they got in there."