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Joke of the Day

"When people fall with their iPhone 6 in pocket and hear a crack sound: ""Please let it be my leg, Lord."""

"How do you confuse a straight person? Tell them they're straight."

"What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One's big and heavy, the other's a little lighter."

"What do you call the mineral found in teeth and tooth enamel? Apatite."

"Shouldn't you pet him first? Two guys are in a park and see a dog licking it's nuts. First Guy: ""Damn I wish I could do that"" Second Guy: ""Shouldn't you pet him first?"""

"I could tell you a joke about Bill Murray in Japan; it would be lost in translation."

"*A conversation between two Wannabe Terrorists * T1: Oi mate, check out this bomb. I got it for a very cheap price!! T2: It's a fake man. T1: Fake? C4 yourself man. *explosion*"

"Here's a bit of advice for you. Advi."

"3: Why are you putting on makeup, Mommy? Me: So I look less tired. 3: Why are you tired? Me: Because I'm a mom. 3: Why are you a mom? Me: 3:"

"If Robbie Rotten's ""We are number one"" is a meme.. Does that make one a musical number?"