201810

Joke of the Day

"My wife thinks I have a gambling habit. She hasn't said anything, but I can bet that's what she is thinking."

"Did you hear about the three-legged dog that never won an argument? He didn't have a leg to stand on."

"Few things can match the satisfaction of high-fiving someone who is trying to give you the Talk To The Hand gesture."

"Finally figured out why even smart people fall for click bait..."

"What kind of phone does a burglar use? A no-key-a"

"shout out to old people for graduating high school without google"

"So my scatterbrained friend accused me of misquoting cliches... Isn't that the pot calling the kettle a racist?!?!"

"My worst fear is seeing one of my tweets marked as ""exhibit A"""

"last I dreamed.... I was a muffler. When I woke up I was exhausted."

"My husband: It'd be nice to have a wife who cooked dinner. Me: ooo!! Can we get one?"