201562

Joke of the Day

"*proposes to girlfriend* *accidentally drops ring in the street* ""I'll still marry you"" Sorry, I'm married to the streets now"

"What's a rapists favorite meal? Spaghetti-No's I'm sorry."

"hot dogs were invented in 1936 by Larry Hotdogs when he accidentally dropped a bag of prize-winning pig assholes in his Dick Shaper Machine"

"I have learned to accept that my parents are ""Santa,"" but I still have no idea how they get to all those other houses."

"What's your best Pirate Joke? What's a pirate's favorite letter? the C!"

"You can't buy a woman's love but you can buy a woman's heart on the black market probably."

"You can justify pretty much any shit you put into your body these days simply by saying, ""But it's got antioxidants."""

"- Dad, why don't we visit Greece to see pyramids? - Son, why don't we visit school to see your geography teacher?"

"I'm no different than any other bachelor. I put my pants on one leg at a time and clean the house once every new girlfriend."

"Earth's scientists have discovered that sheep are smarter than most primates. This explains why not a lot of sheep tune in to Jersey Shore."