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Joke of the Day

"What's the best drug to have sex on? Birth control."

"An oldie for the road This randomly popped into my head at work and as I started saying it, my boss finished it. *Twats* that? I *cunt* hear you. *Tits* okay. I'll *finger* it out later."

"I said ""sad face emoji"" instead of actually frowning today if you want to know how out of touch with reality I am."

"How can you know that you are insecure about what other people think of your post? [deleted]"

"Fidel Castro just died, Cubans can be finally happy that their country will be ruled by the young generation led by a much younger leader. His 85 year old brother!"

"What's the only thing better than a gold medal at the Paralympics? Legs"

"Being possessed would be cool because you could turn your head all the way around to say ""wrong hole"""

"I think Australians are obsessed with true information. They keep telling me to ""get fact""."

"Why is the door knob? Because the key. (ok, i will show myself out)"

"Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks, ""You want fries with that"" because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't ever want fries with anything. Ever."