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Joke of the Day

"I like watching documentaries about murderers because i know i'm doing better than every person in the movie."

"How many gay guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to screw it in, one to pour the wine, and one to say 'marvelous, simply marvelous!'"

"Jedi Knights love analogies. ""Metaphors be with you!"""

"Did you hear about the guy that spilled curry powder in his bed? Woke up in a Korma"

"What's the most Jewish instrument? The Sachs"

"What did one amorous flea say to the other? I love you aw-flea."

"What do you call a short physic that has escaped from jail? A small medium at large"

"What did Hansel and Gretel say when the witch put them in the oven? She diabeetus!"

"What's Glenn's favorite fast food? Popeyes!"

"Yo mama so fat.... that when she sits in space-time she causes gravitational waves"