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Joke of the Day

"Terrible I used to think the brain was the most important organ. Then I thought, look what's telling me that."

"Jackasses and Onions What do you get when you cross a Donkey and an Onion??? You get a great piece of ASS that brings a tear to your eyes!!!!"

"One day, you wake up and everyone has a number over their heads. The number is counting down by the second. Eventually, someone's number reaches zero, and.... They sneeze. Their number resets."

"A cowboy goes to the barber. When the barber is done cutting his hair, the cowboy goes back outside. And guess what? Pony gone."

"""Jesus honey, I don't know. How about a letter, a time of day, and something really Indian"" - M. Night Shyamalan's parents' naming process"

"Who called it a ""backpack"" and not, ""the sexiest way to deliver bees to an ex."""

"Women need to relax and stop worrying so much about their bodies. Men aren't picky! Unless you're chubby or have a wrinkle or something."

"Losing an Electric Drill by Andy Gadget"

"Why couldn't the Italian get into his house? Because he had gnocchi."

"I can still blame my unhealthy eating on ""the holidays"", right? President's Day is coming up."