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Joke of the Day

"Stephen Hawking is an inspiration He's earned millions in the past 10 years without lifting a finger."

"I need some white people jokes. I was talking with some guys at work and came to find that we are all disappointed at the lack of white people joke we know, so let hear what you've got."

"Throwing pregnancy tests into the shopping carts of random couples at Walmart is the only silver lining in my day."

"What do nuclear physicists do when they have time off? They go fission."

"""OMG!!! HeRE LiEs BRiaNnA RiP! :*("" - Tombstones in 2060"

"I think the government caused all the snow in the South Cause I'm Snowden"

"Don't drink and drive, might hit a bump and spill it."

"I'm going to skip home tonight because sometimes life is seriously brilliant. *throws confetti*"

"I had sex with an asian woman in an elevator... It was Wong on so many levels"

"What's the difference between an Anorexic girl and an escalator? The anorexic would not eat Chinese."