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Joke of the Day

"I thought I heard one of the kids opening the furnace earlier Then I remembered the handle was on the outside."

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"What's a neckbeard's favorite spread? Marm'lady"
"this joke has no title What did this joke's mother say to it? ""You're not going anywhere!"" geddit?"
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"Married life - Honey, are you jealous? - Nope! - Admit it, you're jealous! - I told you, I am not! - Then give me a kiss! - GO KISS THAT UGLY-ASS WHORE WHO LIKED YOUR FACEBOOK STATUS!"
"Losing it guys vs girls (NSFW) ""Losing your virginity to an asshole"" is an unfortunate event for girls but a damn good one for guys."
"Do you know why Turkey couldn't see the solar eclipse? It's been censored there."
"A man walks into a bar..... His alcoholism is tearing his family apart."
"This is so embarrassing, what's your name again? - me, the first 30 times I meet everyone"
"What is a Mexican's favorite bookstore? Borders"
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