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Joke of the Day

"A soprano and a violinist fall off a cliff at the same time. Who does first? Who dies first? No one cares. :/"

"What do you call a Mexican without a car... carlos"

"My girlfriend was cooking for our guests. She told me to go in and prepare the table. So I walked in and told them all about her cooking."

"Why's the camel considered the submarine of the desert? Because they're filled with iraqi semen"

"What do you call someone who hates pencils? Erracist"

"I was never a big believer in feng shui, UNTIL I took the urinal off my livingroom wall. It's like freaking magic!"

"What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my van."

"I'm a 40 yr old man sitting at a Cafe with my eyes closed, squirting packets of mayo from under the table at the window as people walk by."

"How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ear pierced? A buccaneer."

"I have a friend who's half Indian. Ian"