194850
Joke of the Day
"Why aren't there any Walmarts in the middle east? Because there's Targets around every corner."
Next Joke
"The last time Twitter was down I was forced to speak to real people. Real people go on and on and on and on, for way over 140 characters..."
"Tell me more about how awful dubstep is, generation that celebrated disco."
"Wise people think all they say, fools say all they think."
"Why does Kim Jong Un love books? Because he is the Supreme Reader."
"My hobbies include humming the Jurassic Park theme song to my chickens, to make them feel more in touch with their ancestors."
"I take it personally when the UPS guy drops off a package for my neighbors but doesn't bring me one."
"Sorry I replied ""yikes"" to your selfie."
"Q: How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb? A: I don't waste my time with these childish jokes."
"I keep an extra stash of tampons in my purse to launch at blowhards who punctuate the end of their sentence with the word, ""Period!"""